 | | | You've crawled into work after the big company product launch/sales meeting/holiday party.Each step feels like an explosion in your head. Every blink of your eye reminds you of the two hours of alcohol induced sleep you had this morning. You keep thinking to yourself "if I can just make it to lunch, I can sleep in my car." You look up and you see the stares of your fellow compatriots, some accusing, others pitying, none ignorant. It's the walk of shame in corporate America.
'What did I do last night?!" This statement has been heard countless times by those of us who are inclined to imbibe more than most. It takes on a whole new meaning when the location of said imbibing occurs in company waters. Sometimes you skate by with little or no consequences, but there are those times when you've blurred the line of suitable conduct. I could write about the implications of inappropriate behavior and professionalism until the cows come home, I am after all an HR professional. However, I'd like to ruminate on this tricky situation from the perspective of one who has walked the plank. Twice.
There are so many excuses aren't there? They kept the bar open. My bOss was more inebriated than I. There wasn't enough water. I forgot to eat. How am I supposed to network sober? Pluto was aligned with Neptune and the atmosphere forced me to drink shots of tequila. The truth is that regardless of how fantastic your excuse, it does nothing but keep you in the past. Take a walk through the garden of your fuzzy memory, watch the project team's interpretation of you slapping your bosses behind, and listen to the janitor's mimicry of your vomiting in the punch bowl. Gain all intelligence regarding your inane behavior under the influence and then let it go. You cannot undo what you have done.
What you can do is prove thet you are mature and politically savvy enough to learn from your mistakes. Apologize. Apologize for your behavior and your choices. No excuses. A simple and sincere, -I'm sorry for call1ng the CFO's wife a fat cow and I am ashamed of my choice to dance on the dinner table." You will be surprised at how many people will empathize with your plight, as they have done the walk of shame too. Be humble and genuine. People will forgive you and forget you for one simple reason. You now have three months of solid groveling, extra hours, and crappy projects ahead of you.
Bear your burden with a smile, my friends, because it is only time and an open bar that will cause one of your associates to walk the plank themselves. And when they do, smile, hand them your work, and go home early. Cheers!
Most important, have fun and enjoy the process of getting to know another human being. And drink lots of water. | | | | Mona is an HR professional working in Philadelphia and helping one manager at a time. She enjoys dancing, reading, martial arts, and good conversations. | | |
